sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
