we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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