I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
