Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
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