so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
