4 words: hood of his car
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
