If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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