Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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