TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize