When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
