you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
