you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
