i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
zippers are such a cool invention
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
