just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Just pee around me
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
