A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
