I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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