Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
