those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
