just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
