I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
