so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize