Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Randomize
