I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
