I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
