I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize