Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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