Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
