We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
