can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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