Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Randomize
