Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
