For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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