Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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