I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
