Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
