i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize