for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
