Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
This is the high leading the old right now
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
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