Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
