Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
