i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I think i peed on brittanys purse
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
