oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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