Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Randomize
