Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
