North Korea, Best Korea!
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
