pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
