You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize