can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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