The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Randomize