I'm laying in your front yard are you home
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
