I hate all girls vehemently.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
